Wednesday, July 29, 2009

my life thus far...

I have wanted to teach for as long as I can remember. I have tried numerous different ways to become a teacher and until a few hours ago I thought this dream was finally going to be a reality. I am not certified yet because once again standardized tests and I don’t get along. I was one point from the passing the last time and I just took the most horrible test ever again this previous Saturday. It’s called the PLT and it’s horrible. It’s two hours of writing and more writing. I speak of this because I have yet to lie to a potential employer about my lack of certification and my issues with the PLT. With this knowledge I received two job offers from OKC public schools, and well I chose to take my dream job 8th grade social studies. A few hours ago that job was taken away due to my circumstances. What are those circumstances? Are they new? Have I lied? No, but the principal either didn’t listen to me during my lack of interview or chose to ignore it I don’t know either way he took away my job with a two second phone call.

It sucks and I’m sad and I needed my nanny more than ever today but she’s in heaven and looking down on her baby. I haven’t really talked about my nanny’s passing because I was doing quite well with it knowing that she was no longer suffering and was in heaven with all her family but today wasn’t good for me. I have had a bond with my nanny since I was a young girl and I can’t explain it but she was always there for me, driving me to day camp, Sunday school, watching me try to dance in a dance recital, coming to my college graduation oxygen tank in hand. Nothing was going to stop my nanny from being there for her baby and that baby was me. I am not even the baby I lost that lovely title by six months but to her I was her baby’s baby and that was enough. We had a bond that can’t be explained but not only was she my grandmother she was my best friend, person I turned to when my mom wasn’t listening to me, who annoyed me as much as my own mother did, but I loved that woman. I have inherited her ability to speak my mind and speed like there is no tomorrow but I like to think that I learned that family is the most important thing from her as well. She believed that family was important and no matter what you stuck with your family. I believe that she shared that with me, and I hope that I can share that with my non-existent family.

That's what been going on these past few weeks. I will post more tomorrow.

1 comment:

Caroline said...

Hello!

I found your blog through the grapevine of blogs that I read. I too am trying to become a teacher right now and have been very frustrated by the process!! I passed my math 4-8 exam in april and applied to every middle school in the dallas area (approx. 15 different districts) and have had little to no responses from any of them. I am taking the generalist 4-8 exam tomorrow in hopes that it will make me more marketable (bc it will allow me to also teach elementary 4-6 grades).

I totally feel your pain though. It is so annoying having to go through this long process when you know that your heart is in the right place and that you will make a great teacher (prob a lot better than a lot of the ones who are already teaching). Just hang in there and know that it will happen eventually. Just might have to be patient for awhile (atleast that is what I keep telling myself)! Best of luck to you!!

XOXO,

Caroline

PS: Sorry about your nanny. I'm sure she is smiling down on you!


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